Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Magazine Confuses Real with Ugly

There's been a lot of talk recently about Philadelphia being rated “Least Attractive Cityby Travel & Leisure Magazine. That's bullshit. Well, Kinda... No, but still fuck that magazine.


First of all, let's address “Travel & Leisure Magazine.” For being so picky about what's pretty and what's not, you sure do have some of the most boring, uninspired and ugly covers ever to grace a monthly mag. Seriously, if taking a vacation is going to be as dull and insipid as you make it look I'd rather shop for graphic tees on South Street then peruse the DVD machine at Wawa for fun.


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(It's a fun shirt.)


Ooooo, I'm in a hammock,”

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Oh, Philly's so ugly but hammocks rule...”

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Get a new fucking idea “Travel & Leisure Magazine,” throw in a damn beach chair every once in a while.


Secondly, we don't give two shits about what your “readers” think is pretty or ugly. Last time I checked, families of four from Cincinnati filling out questionnaires in the airport, aren't exactly the most fashion forward.


Look at Miami and San Diego, two cities that ranked high in the poll. They are full of silly-fake people who've had too much plastic surgery, wear too much make-up, and tan until every molecule of their skin is perfectly (which ironically enough is imperfectly) even, crispy and pre-cancerous. (Of course, this is a stereotype and we do not endorse the use of stereotypes... most of the time.)


Philly's more realer. We don't mind a chipped tooth now and then. Our women wear make-up only to accentuate. We enjoy pale skin and/or arms and legs full of tattoos. We don't mind and often search out a little B.O. And we think plastic surgery is for weak people and prize our flaws.


So one more time for good measure, FUCK TRAVEL AND LEISURE MAGAZINE!!


This weekend, Ugh went out to prove the magazine wrong. Here's the Philadelphia your “readers” must have missed...


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And at night,


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(Ok, Louisa's in one.. but she's a Philadelphian too.)



Written by Conrad Benner, Photos by Louisa Engle

and Sarah B

2 comments:

mizzmetro said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mizzmetro said...

I don't know about you, but I am totally embracing this "fugly Philly" thing. Or "Phugly Philly" thing. Or "Phugadelphia" thing. Whatever you want to call it. I have embraced it so much that I have started making up phrases for it, three of which I have already listed. I am so thrilled that we were voted America's ugliest city that I have completely given up on personal hygiene and appearance --- and it is FANTASTIC. In fact, I punched myself in the face, like, 32 times last night just so I could knock out a few teeth and sport two black eyes like a goddamn champion. I only shop at the Rastafarian stores on South Street, too. Yep.