Aging Blog Limps On

... Philadelphia's hottest 'listings' site uses some left over words to form a thought... All the while quickly ceasing whatever edge they ever had...

“Dickhurt” doesn't even begin to describe how we felt when we were emailed the story posted about us on Tuesday... Felt more like a dick sucking. Don't worry though, we won't cum in your mouth, we promise.

And in response to Philebutards, Philebrity made a stunning observation. Get ready... blogs want attention, and can get it by making fun of bigger blogs. Thanks, Philebrity!

Thats right, Big Sweeney (founder of most blogs starting with Ph) took a minute from talking about his favorite bands and posting local news stories that he read on 6abc.com (with plenty of new adjectives of course) to actually write... something.

Wow, quite honestly we were surprised by how easy it was to wake the Blog Giant.

But seriously, it's kind of sad that Joey missed the boat on this one. As we see it here at Ugh News, we live in a singular world where everyone wants to be a celebrity and our culture is obsessed with the Self. Seems obvious that not only would people probably not mind being made fun of, but to highlight their photos out of the hundreds posted daily makes them even more famous, no matter what we say about them.

The best we can hope for is that people begin to take themselves less seriously, lighten up a bit and get out of that Self for a second.

That's when the cool part sets in, when people start to realize that it doesn't matter how tight your pants are, or if your hair gets frizzy today, or if you look a little pudgy in that one photo. And you can scroll down to an article about the real shit we need to be talking about... Genocides in Darfur, or Boycotting the Beijing Olympics, or how Comcast is probably committing the first Internet crimes by limiting service to certain web sites.

And the idea that the people we make fun of “can't fight back” is completely misrepresentative of what really happens. In fact, just hours after we posted the article, we were torn apart for how mean and, “pot-calling-kettle” like, we were, all by regular people. The idea that only Big Blog Giants like Sweeney have voices is exactly the outdated and antiquated thinking that looms over Philebrity.

So, what exactly is Papa Joey worried about?

Remember when you we're younger and MTV was really cool? And then there was VH1 too, and you would always kinda flip by VH1 when MTV was running commercials, but there was never anything good on, so you would just flip back to MTV.
Well, Philebrity = VH1, not to say that we're MTV, but... yeah, maybe we're a young MTV.

Look Mr. Sweeney, if you can't see the comeuppance of an interesting, edgy, educated, young blog past your beer belly... maybe you should sit down.

Written by Conrad Benner

Interesting side point: “Cut” isn't exactly the best way to say that I stopped sending you articles. And, where's “Talkin' Shit” now? Kind of got boring after I left, huh.

... U mad Philebrity? Dare you to write about this one.